Saturday, November 20, 2010

My daughter, the perp-in-training

The following was a conversation I had with my 4-year-old daughter while she was sitting next to her not-quite-two-year-old brother, watching television.

Her: Mommy, look! He put his booger on his leg all by himself!

(I check out the situation and, sure enough, my son has a slimy green booger stuck to the underside of his thigh, which seems like an odd place for him to put a booger. Not to mention that he hasn't quite gotten the hang of nosepicking yet.)

Me: Are you sure that's not your booger?

Her: (not missing a beat) I think he grabbed my booger and put it on his leg.

Me: Are you sure you didn't put your own booger on his leg?

Her: (again, instantly) I don't remember.

Should I be troubled, or proud?

Thursday, November 11, 2010

What a drag

This blog rarely goes very deep. It's usually some combination of kids, fashion—the bad and the good—and mom craziness. I keep it light because that's how I get through all of the above. That said, I read a post recently on another blog that went straight to my heart. As a mom whose daughter wants Lightning McQueen on everything she wears, including her underwear (so I buy her boys briefs and let her rock it out), and whose son who loves nothing more than donning his sisters unworn princess dress and dancing spins around the living room, I applaud this mom wholeheartedly. And in a world with so much wrong, it's disheartening to think that anyone, much less a mother, would judge a kid's self-expression.

Without further ado, here is the post. And come to think of it, it IS about kids, fashion and mom craziness after all.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Dad Life

A friend of mine recently shared this video with me and I think it is pure gold. Dads can be frumpy too—I mean, we've all had our eyeballs burned at the park by hairy legs that end in black socks and Tevas. (Which just goes to show that Tevas are gender-agnostic frump.) This video is ALMOST as good as the Sienna "Swagger Wagon" videos which, if you haven't seen them, stop reading this right now and go straight to YouTube. Enjoy!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Smuggling Diapers

It was an act of desperation.

We had just finished swim class, the two kids and I crowded in the bathroom, trying to rinse, dry off, and change without slipping on the floor or sticking to something disgusting. Once I had gotten my daughter and I together, I turned to deal with my slippery wet and totally naked son. I reached into the bag and.... OH CRAP. NO DIAPER.

I panicked, wondering for a moment if I could put his shorts on with nothing on underneath, only to remember that he seems to take the lack of a diaper as an open invitation to pee on anything he can. I knew I'd be dealing with a constant stream all the way to the car. Suddenly, I saw a nicely packed canvas bag emblazoned with the name PETER. I could tell just by looking at the outside of the bag that it was owned by the kind of mom who would never forget her son's diaper after swim class. (I, on the other hand, was carrying a reusable bag from the Apple Store with a rip in the top.) So I looked around and, seeing no one, rummaged though that bag wildly until I found a beautiful dry diaper. (Don't worry, there was more than one. Of course, because Peter's mom is organized.) I wish I could say I felt guilty, but instead I felt wickedly triumphant. Damn, I'm resourceful.

That said, I'll never forget a diaper after swim class again. Peter's mom might not be there to save my ass next time.